Cerebreoredundogram

The common term is "earworm," but I prefer "cerebreoredundogram". It sounds less parasitic. Both words mean the same thing--that song that gets stuck in your head for an extended period of time. Often cerebreoredundogram turns into "humnauseum"--the outward vocalization of said song.
Yesterday morning I had a choral arrangement of the liturgy stuck in my head—the piece was Joyous Light of Glory, Carl Schalk's arrangement of the Phos Hilaron. Being a portion of Evening Prayer, it didn’t quite fit the time of day.
This morning it was Tell out My Soul, an arrangement of the Magnificat by K. Lee Scott. It remained there all day. I suppose getting the liturgy stuck in one's head is not a bad thing. It gives one a chance to ponder Christ, even if the words pop up inadvertently.

Oh, That's Just Your Opinion

Today’s guest on Issues, Etc. was speaking about abortion and confusing objective claims with subjective claims. During the conversation the guest mentioned a bumper sticker which said, “Don’t like abortion? Don’t have one,” and indicated that this misses the point of the whole issue. He likened it to saying, “Don’t like slavery? Don’t own a slave,” or “Don’t like spousal abuse? Don’t beat your wife.”
I would glibly offer this statement in response to the original bumper sticker: “Don’t like life? Don’t conceive one.” One on the pro-choice side of the issue might say that this statement is too self-righteously derisive, yet the same person passing judgment on this response would likely not have the same opinion on the original statement. Why is that, do you think? Could it be that one’s right to reproduce and abort is morally acceptable, yet indicating one’s displeasure with such an approach is morally reprehensible?
I will agree that morality cannot be defined by personal opinion if humans are to co-exist and survive to tell the tale. Truly, if morality is defined by personal opinion, then Hannibal Lector is fully self-justified in consuming his victims. After all, they are rude and obnoxious and no one will miss them; in fact, he could be a hero. Oh, wait, there I go again being self-righteously derisive. . .

BO on Vacation

I am back and had a nice Christmas break. That’s the nice thing about doing what I do—I still have a Christmas break, even if it is only half of what it was in college. Even if I take a vacation, though, I am still on the lookout for BO material, and I am never disappointed by the superfluity of available material. Some highlights are as follows:
Watching the dancing fountains in front of a certain hotel “dance” to The Hallelujah Chorus—with text. How idiosyncratic it is to hear “The kingdom of this world is become the kingdom of our Lord and of His Christ” being blared while nearby men hawk female companions (which is illegal in most states, if you know what I mean).
Passing a billboard on the interstate which on one side simply reads, “GOD.” The other side says, El Shaddai, Theos, I Am, God and Allah.” I suppose I should be used to this day and age in which false claims are made about the true God to promote unity in diversity.
Reading the bumper sticker which said, “Defend Reproductive Freedom”. I’m not sure what that means. Does that mean no limits on abortion? Abortion is not freedom of reproducing—it’s limiting reproduction. Maybe they’re protesting the concept of mass sterilization, but that topic is passé, so I guess I’m not so sure what their point is.
Wondering about the billboards in the airport. There were two billboards encouraging conservation and green living. One showed a profusion of lightbulbs, the other showed row upon row of water cooler-sized water bottles. Each one demonstrated the amount of resources (energy or water) wasted by frivolous use of our resources. This got me wondering—why does no one indicate outrage these images portray about the wasteful behavior of people? Is it not my personal choice to leave all the lights on in my house? Is it not my personal choice to use as much water as I want? Why does no one deface these pointed billboards? Yet, put up white crosses in a field to represent humans who were denied the chance of life (forget about liberty or property or the pursuit of happiness), yet see how they seethe. . .

For Your Amusement

Stop by The Wittenburg Door for an amusing take on CCM. Warning: If you lack a sense of humor, skip it.
The only thing missing is the key change!

Christmas Past

I suppose it is too early for Christmas memories, yet there are a few things that come to recollection from Decembers when I was younger.
I remember the cookie making--especially persimmon bars--and wrapping gifts to my dad's holiday records. I remember decorating the Christmas tree with all the ornaments, even the gaudy ones, much to my mother's chagrin, and sitting in the darkened living room on the floor in front of the wall heater with the tree lights on--what a sight!
More than these domestic memories are the memories connected with Advent and church. First there was midweek church services. I cannot recall a time when my parents did not go to midweek services during Advent.
Then there was the preparations for the Christmas concert. The school choir and the adult choir always held a concert at church in mid-December, and the program was nearly always the same. The children's choir and adult choir would alternate and congregational hymns were interspersed throughout. We began with "Prepare the Way" and Advent; we ended with "O Come All Ye Faithful" and "Silent Night".
School children became part of the choir in 3rd grade. By the time I was in 2nd grade I was familiar with the songs and could not wait to sing with the older kids. Our favorite was a piece called "Tiny King". By the time I was in 8th grade I had lost count of the number of times I had sung the song, but I had moved up to the stage of accompanying the choir. It was a wonderful piece to sing, and an exceedingly fun piece to play.
Congregational members were eligible to sing with the adult choir in 8th grade as well. That year was a busy concert for me--I hardly sat down all night! I thought my last Christmas concert was my senior year of high school, but it turned out that I was able to make it home for one when I was in college, and they still let me sing.
Christmas Eve was the standard children's program. My siblings and I were involved the years we didn't go out of town on Christmas Eve. It was the typical recitation of the Christmas stories and the oldest boy and girl always got to play Mary and Joseph. I will ever remember my father saying, "Remember, speak slowly and distinctly." The children always received the traditional bags of candy and nuts and oranges on Christmas Eve.
Advent, Christmas, and December have changed for me over the years. I still go to church during Advent, but there is no longer a choir concert. I do not have to memorize passages for a Christmas Eve program or get a bag of candy afterwards. All these changes, yet one thing never does: We are still in Advent. We still wait for Christ's coming. We still prepare to celebrate Christ's birth. We still say come, Lord Jesus.

"Tis the Season to Be Pensive

I should know better. I should never allow myself to get off during class; however, sometimes I don't mind the direction the conversation is going, and I'm one of those types who take the soapbox when one can get it. Too bad it always backfires. I often come out of these discussions feeling slightly frustrated. Our postmodern society has shaped the mindset of our children. They have learned well what it has taught them. “You can believe whatever you want, as long as that is what we tell you. If your beliefs conflict, that’s okay too. Don’t tell anyone they’re wrong, for you are wrong to say they’re wrong.” It thought seems to have eradicated logic. I wish to help my students understand and think, yet I fear they or their parents may perceive it as indoctrination. If only I were better at communicating this kind of stuff. . .

Get Your Programs Here

Could someone explain to me why we need programs to get people in the church door? Sure, be welcoming (nobody likes an unfriendly bunch). Sure, invite the community in. Why, however, does the church need to market itself like another commodity supplier? Why does it have to have community open house events just to make its presence known?
Maybe I’m being too harshly critical at worst, or idealistic at best. In a theoretical world, people would show up at our churches seeking pure doctrine and Christ crucified. That is not reality, of course. I’d say that we Lutherans have a pretty good thing going here. Too bad that stuff called original sin has to muck it all up.
It just appears that we seem to be missing the point. It’s not about numbers—either in the pews or in the plates. Okay, reality check again. Without numbers in the pews or in the plates one cannot sustain. On the other hand, whose job is it to grow the church? That’s a rhetorical question, in case you’re wondering. You know the answer is not people.
Okay, I can hear it now: “What about the great commission?” Sure, but one has to remember--going and making disciples isn’t like going and making a bird house. Yep, here’s your disciple; let me make another for you. A pastor who is much smarter than I explained it to me once: Making disciples is actually a verb. Go and disciple (discipling, discipled, had discipled, if you want to conjugate it). It’s a process that is continual. How? Word and Sacrament. Catechesis. It is the cooperation of the laity and the pastors. The laity have the workaday world contact with people. They are the ones who can initiate the connection. That should be the contact to get them in the door. Then the pastor can do his job.
Programs and bait-and-switch tactics cannot sustain a congregation. If a person is looking for single parent support groups, pick-up basketball games, and community dinners; let me direct you to the community center down the road. I won’t go to them looking for forgiveness; why should they look to me for a synchronized swimming program?